Sunday, March 17, 2013

The Secret Formula for a Bestseller


I think I see that some authors have found a new formula for creating Bestsellers. 

And I am about to let you all in on the secret...

(drum roll please)

Unicorns


 

Yes, unicorns. 


Now you may have read some Bestsellers lately and thought to yourself: 

I never saw a unicorn in there.
I would know if I saw a mythical beast in a book...





Let's review the formula for these New Adult/Young Adult Contemporary Bestsellers (no, I'm not going to name names, or titles, because that's mean and douchy):  




 



Hunkybroodingbadboymanchild + Shakespearean dialog + super in touch with emotions =  Protagonist's love interest
 
*Ka-Blam*
Bestseller!

That my friends is a fucking unicorn




 
And here's a newsflash: 
there is no brooding football player/bad-boy/vampire/werewolf that will fulfill this formula
these young men don't exist

anywhere

not even in the mountains of North Korea.
 (go to that link and read, it will enrich your life)


 

Don't get me wrong. When I completed these books my initial reaction was that I really liked them. I even re-read some parts. It's when I sat back for a few weeks and thought about them and what makes them so successful and great and awesome, that I figured this out.





Now, I have to retreat to my usual science fiction. 


Reading these chick-flick novels is turning my insides all soft and gooshey.




Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Monday, March 11, 2013

Dear Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,
Thank you for your suggestions. I'm glad you enjoyed the book. 
-M







The Phoenix Project - Paperback Release!



Don't have a Kindle? or Kindle app?


$8.99 in the Amazon store



Want to know what people are saying?
See one of the many 5-star reviews below:



Sunday, March 10, 2013

Looking for Inspiration? Try T-rex!

As an author... Yes, I have taken it upon myself to call myself an author... I published my debut novel after all!

As an author, I look for inspiration everywhere. In the places I go and the mundane tasks I complete. I observe and examine like a total creeper. 
I answer questions awkwardly to see people's reactions... 
(actually, I'm just awkward)

I look at pictures and read and watch movies. 

All these tasks help me find inspiration in my writing to develop new stories and characters.




Are you searching for inspiration?

I've found some.

 Tyrannosaurus Rex


And now you ask: "Why choose T-Rex?"

T-Rex was one of the fiercest predators of the late cretaceous period



So why would he make a great protagonist or villain?

Let's look at the deeper side of T-Rex:

T-Rex has trouble showing emotions...




T-Rex has wishes, hopes, and dreams that many don't know about...




T-Rex has trouble with simple day-to-day tasks...




 T-Rex has trouble with self-image....



T-Rex struggled in High School...



T-Rex gets judged for shit he has no control over...



T-Rex is kinda like the black-sheep of the family...



 T-Rex likes to tell jokes... 
and sometimes they're not that funny... 
and no-one laughs...



















T-Rex has one hell of a digestive system...







 Even with all of the factors inhibiting T-Rex he's found a way to succeed:





 And this, my friends, is why T-Rex may just be your perfect protagonist.